OCEANSIDE — How people deal with the grief of losing a loved one to homicide is as unique as those being remembered April 17 at the 19th annual Candlelight Vigil for Homicide Survivors.

Roughly 40 family and friends of homicide victims used the vigil at the Flying Bridge restaurant in Oceanside to not only remember their loved ones, but to share their wisdom about adjusting to the grief.

“I don’t think you ever lose that pain, you don’t ever not grieve, but it gets easier as time goes on,” said grief therapist Linda Brown.

During the vigil, which was presented by the North County Homicide Survivor Support Group during National Crime Victims’ Rights Week, co-founder Brown applauded the community of survivors for being “warriors” and for their efforts of finding positive ways to give back to the community, which includes helping to balance the scales of victims’ rights.

Barbara Ruscitti, the widow of Salvatore Ruscitti, who was the victim of a murder-for-hire killing outside of his Leucadia home in 1988, said after her husband’s death she got involved with legislation in Sacramento to pass the three strikes law.

“First you are very much a victim, then you are a survivor, and then finally, if you can become an advocate, this can really help you get over the hump,” Ruscitti said.

Arthur Serrin, whose 39-year-old daughter, Jodine Elizabeth Serrin, was murdered in her Carlsbad condominium on Valentine’s Day last year, said he and his wife have focused their attention on getting legislation passed that would expand the national DNA database to include the DNA profiles of individuals arrested for misdemeanors.

He said since his daughter’s killer hasn’t been identified, the only shot law enforcement has at finding the murderer is to match the DNA left behind by the suspect.

“You do as parents what you do to help others like yourself, and take the steps you think should be done in the justice system,” Serrin said.

At the end of the evening, everybody in attendance lit a candle in honor of a lost friend or family member..